Why is it that I keep talking about gay marriage?
Perhaps you think that’s a simple answer – gay people just keep whining about it. That’s what we do, whine and complain about our oppression in an eternal pity party for ourselves. Right? Wrong.
Let’s look at it this way. Say you’ve been dating someone for a while, it’s starting to get serious, and you’re thoughts are shifting from the here-and-now to the future. Or, say you have a crush at someone from a distance. You think they’re hot. Now, say one of your favorite people asks to take you to lunch. Take your pick, mom, brother, college roommate, golfing buddy… This person will sit you down and not just tell you that they think it is completely wrong for you to be in that relationship in the first place, not just that you shouldn’t ever even think of marrying this person, but that even being attracted to the person, let alone in love with them, is simply wrong. By default, you are wrong. Your love, or even potential love, wrong. Now wouldn’t that just piss you off?
Now, imagine, instead of it being your mom at lunch, that it’s law. Imagine that there are organizations that exist solely to prevent you and “people like you” from putting a ring on it. Imagine that people get to VOTE on whether or not you marry someone. Preachers give sermons about it. Schools ban discussion of it. Debates are held, people are elected (or not) based on their position on it, people choose friends over it… Talk about feeling like the whole world is in your business!
Can you even imagine what that would feel like? To have the terms of your happily ever after in the hands of the rest of your state or nation? And that’s just here in the United States. There are places where even thinking gay thoughts will get you killed (indeed, it has happened in the US of A as well).
Why would gay people, myself included, not keep bitching about it? The nation keeps debating over whether or not we can get married! Children have stopped speaking to the parents over far less! People dedicate their time, money, effort, even their whole lives, to fighting the legalization of same-sex marriage. It is their mission to keep a legally legitimized ring off of my lifetime commitment to the one I love. Who wouldn’t be angry? And even if not angry, with so much against us, who wouldn’t speak up to make sure that our side of the story is heard?
So that’s why I keep bringing it up. I care because people care whether or not I put a ring on it. People who would probably find it rude and tasteless to sit down their best girl or guy friend at lunch and tell her or him that they just can’t marry the person they love because they just don’t like it. Interesting, no?
Now, when do I get to vote on who you can marry?